Ok well the hardest part of this last week is behind us. I am not going to sugar coat it, other than one year ago it was the hardest week of my life! I laughed I cried, I stuck my head in the sand to try and ignore it, I played with my kids to ignore it, I cleaned my house to pretend it wasn't happening. They all worked....well kind of! What it all boils down to I guess is, It is what it is and all I can do is survive! Lacey came bounding out of her room early Valentines day morning, looking quite the mess! I asked what was wrong, knowing full well what was wrong! She says "MOM it's VALENTINES DAY!" at that moment I knew no matter my feelings on this horrible day I was going to have to make it Ok for Lacey. This was a good thing, it gave me a purpose, a goal for the day. I wasn't going to have much time to "think". I looked at her and said, "yes honey I know what day it is. But I also know how mad your Grandma would be at you if you decided to spend this day of love being so sad and grumpy. It is what it is Lacey and we can't change it all we can do is make the best of it!" I think she was shocked by my answer. She looked at me and said "I know but it still stinks!" I say "Yes your right it stinks as bad as your dad!" she laughs and drys up the tears. I spent the day hugging my little Cylie and holding her while she slept, I played as many games with the kids as I could. I gave Dad the gift I made him and he hung out for a while in the morning. I made a yummy dinner and Lacey made cupcakes. Dad came back over for dinner and watched some annoying guy show with Matt. All in all it could have been a much worse day I suppose! Lacey and I talked about grandma when ever we had a great memory, Bridger was oblivious and Matt walked on egg shells. Now if we can just get through the next couple of days worth of memories I can stand before you and truly declare I AM A SURVIVOR!
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Today is my sister Michelle's birthday. I wish I could dedicate a whole post just to her on her birthday, but sadly she will always and forever be cursed to sharing her birthday around such a horrible time for our family. I want to share with you all what makes Michelle and I such great sister's and friends. Growing up I wouldn't necessarily call Michelle and I friends! She was the sister that played "the" game that I wanted nothing to do with! I must say life would have been easier had I just shut up and follow her lead and play "the" game as beautifully as she did. It would have been very nice to be able to stay out as late as I wanted, have an endless supply of "grade" money, not 1 but 2 cars bought and paid for, for me. But alas it wasn't my style. Even then it was my way or the highway! Having not played the game it put some stress on our relationship. I knew she was better than me in most things, which is probably why I didn't participate in "the" game, I knew she would do it better. She was better in school, sports, church, she made smarter choices than I did. Somewhere along the way of adult hood I pulled my head out of the sand and realized that yes she did a lot of things better than I did but she didn't do EVERYTHING better. Mom and Dad loved me too it was just harder for them to give me rewards when they weren't always deserved. Some where along the way I grew up and got over it. I am not sure when, I can't really remember a time in my adult years that I don't remember having a close relationship with Michelle. Lori says we bonded over the loss of Michelle's son Kurt. Maybe we did, or maybe we were just growing up and had more in common than we did when we were younger. Whatever and however it happened I am so eternally grateful it did happen. Michelle is one of my biggest cheerleaders. She lifts me up when I am down, she cheers for me to get up when I have fallen. I can't imagine not seeing her everyday or at least calling her on the phone. We drive to and from work together and have lunch together almost every day during the week. She is an amazing mother, wife, sister, daughter, and friend. My sister's and I are so super close which I love. I can't imagine living this crazy life with out having them by my side. So to my sister Michelle I sing "Happy Birthday to you (cha cha cha) Happy Birthday to you (cha cha cha) Happy Birthday dear Michelle, Happy Birthday to you! Thanks for being such an amazing sister and friend!
Tyler was here for the weekend so we thought we would do something fun. Matt and I took the kids bowling a couple weekends before. I thought Matt had a horrible time, so when he suggested that we do it again I was shocked! We have been playing the wii version of bowling at home,let me just say how annoying it is to get beat by a 5 year old EVERY time! I guess Matt forgot we weren't wii bowling his first time up, seriously if I wasn't afraid of him getting so mad we were going to leave I would have laughed out loud! He got up there and placed himself so strategically and concentrated, he started his approach and thought he was a Pro in real life, somehow he slipped and went half way down the lane, it was so dang funny to watch! But like I said for fear of making the kids leave when we just got started I shot a look at Lacey and her friend that said if you laugh you die! He got up and recovered like a champ and made a joke of it! Then we kinda chuckled! I told him to remember we aren't playing the wii this is for real! Lacey loved it! Bridger thought he was hot stuff! Bridger and Brook can only handle one game before there attention span has hit it's max! For any of you that haven't bowled with two 5 years old kids let me just say save all your patience for the week, you will need ALLOT of it! We let them roll the ball themselves and sometimes we wondered if the ball would even make it down the alley! Sometimes it would take so long for the ball to get down to the end Bridger would lay on the floor to wait for it!
His victory jumps where pretty fun too! The second time we went both Lacey and Bridger got STRIKES! Crazy! Lacey hopes to make this a weekend tradition, I told her not to get her hopes too high with that, but we will try and go as often as possible. 
This weekend is going to be busy we got word on Monday that Tyler will be getting to go to State Wrestling this weekend. We are so excited for him! We were pretty bummed when his districts didn't go as well as we hoped! He got hosed by that darn clock! Every time he would get his guy in a good spot to pin him the time would run out and they would have to re-set or whatever you call it! He did a great job and we are so proud of him! I am not sure why he ended up getting to go after all I haven't gotten the full story but whatever the reason we wish him LUCK! Well I better get back to the grind! I have told myself I am going to get all the things done at the office that I hate doing and always put off, so wish me luck!
